A list of the things that are wrong with this situation!
1. She is in control
2. She is more worried about her and Grant than she is Landon
3. Grant is  being very sneaky
4. They will be meeting in Vegas for a weekend without me


Well let start to tackle this list but not in the order you may think lets start with item 3 Grant being sneaky.so out of the blue he gets a phone call from his ex. not just any ex his SONS mother who also just happens to be the one girl who  (although he will never admit it) he still has feels for. Yes I know he is not IN lover with her but I know I can tell that he still has feelings for. so how am I suppose to handle this support his all the way. Let him work through it alone don't pressure him to tell you what he thinks or how he feels. And Heaven forbid you ask what is going through her head although I am female I know what she is thinking. If he fell in love with me once I bet he will do it again especially since he is such a good guy and wants to do whats right for Landon. So all I have to do is flirt a little  and talk about the good old days and about how much I have changed. But no Im not suppose to ask I just wait. He will come to me when he is ready. Well let me tell you that is bull shit! And also what I will do.  I will lay in bed and wait for him to be done "building a relationship" with the one girl who has ever meant something to him and is now the mother of his son before he rolls over and talks to me or pays me any attentions. I will lay awake for hours thinking about whats going to happen. Weather that mean he wakes up one day and decides to tell me that he needs to be with her to figure out what is best for Landon or that they have unresolved issues that he needs to leave me for. Or the ever more popular they never got closer. Or better yet he actually stands up for himself and US and tell her that there is nothing between them and she either grow up and be a mother for her son and let Grant be a father or she needs to go crawl under whatever rock she came out from under and let Grant and me for that matter go on with life. Now despite how this may sound is not necessarily the way that I want it to happen but is  honestly the way I see it happening. Either way I get screwed by either losing the one person who means the world to me or seeing that one person get his heart torn out of his chest once again by this Women. That right there is the hole reason this whole situation is going to make me lose my mind!  In case you missed it the fact that... I don't know weather or not I should say situation or her neither of witch have anything to do with me have be ability to turn my entire world upside down and that is why this whole situation just sucks beyond words.
On a different note I am completely pissed that I have been thrown into the type of custody battle that I have  promised myself that I would never put myself into. If I were to ever have a child and the relationship between me and the father didn't work out for whatever reason I would decide that I either wanted him to be apart of that child's life or not! No games none of this settling because he is the father or giving him a million chances. And most of all telling him to leave (or letting him choose to leave and then come back when he is ready) and them come back have a chance to have a part of this child's life but only by my terms. I have seen many many people and children hurt by this game now not only am I thrown into it but I have no control in it.
That is new to me being; in a situation where I have no control.  Im use to thing like money and time getting in the way but never a basic since of control. Just waiting to see what will come of your life. It sucks.... more than any words can describe. Mostly because all I can think of is the worst possible way this can turn out.
Why I dislike her for starters she is trying to take Grant away from me. She is a girl she thinks she is entitled to him. And that she deserves him because she needs a father for her son. Well let me tell you honey; that's not how things work. You need to quit being so self centered and worry about your son. Come to terms with that fact that you aren't getting him back so suck it up and work something out so that Landon has parents that will show him how to live life to its fullest; even when you are thrown into situations that suck as much as this one.
And one more reason that this whole situation sucks because the best that could happen is Grant gets to talk to him or skype him or see him a few times a year. And that to me is not a parent. Honestly why waste everyone's time and energy. Being a parent isn't about a long distance relationship or sending presents for Christmas or his birthday its about being there for the little things all his first. Being there to kiss his scraped hands and knees when he fall down or teaching him to ride is bike or to get up with him when he has a bad dream or wets the bed. To teach him to be himself and not worry about what the other kids are saying or dong. And to treat others with the respect that you expect back from them and to open doors for girls and everything else about being a gentleman. And that life doesn't hand you a damn thing you have to work for everything. In my opinion if you aren't there everyday to teach and do these thing for them then don't waste anyone's time. And it suck because I don't think that its Grants or for that fact Jeanne's fault. It was best for everyone that they went their own ways to learn and grow from there mistakes and they did but now its too late to go back and fix the past. They cant change who they were or how things worked out; what they can and need to do is move on. let the past be the past and continue to grow for the better don't get stuck on the what could have been or how good (or bad) it was just move on.
AHHH..... the trip to Vegas. Just another way I am left completely out of the loop. I understand that its not my situation; but at the same time I have said before it completely affect my life in ways that I have already stated. Then there are the simple reasons that are built into my genes just because I am a girl; example I am not ok with the fact that this girl is the one girl from Grants past that meant and still means something to him. AKA I am threatened by their past and the fact that she is the mother of his son ( I will never be able to put into words how much I hate this fact.) and for these reasons NO I don't want them meeting or even have to go threw this building a relationship thing. But I am excepting these things and still love Grant with all my heart. Not saying that it doesn't take me back to being a kid and wishing I had powers to change things; but hey a trip down memory lane that could be considered a plus to this whole mess.